Am I an illusion
Am I just a dream
Inside, ((I am nothing))
Like what I may seem

Inside I am nervous
Inside I am shy
Inside I can't breathe
I can't laugh, I just cry

Deep down in my chest
Lies a broken old heart
As silent as death
Since at death did we part

I'm numb and I'm broken
I'm lost and confused
I'm often mispoken
I'm easily bruised

I'm not worth a thing
To the ones that I love
I feel warmth from below
And a [vacant] above

Blind

A raindrop plummets
To the ground
My ears too weak
To hear the sound
But if they could
What would they hear?
And would I notice,
Would I care?

Would orchestrated
Music flow
A song, a tune
That we don't know
And no-one's ever
Heard before
Just as one raindrop
Hits the floor?

What if my sight
Were sharper too?
What could be seen?
Would things look new?
Would they look fresh?
Would they look bright?
If only I had
Better sight?

No shadows to
Distract the eye
A world of light!
But I would sigh
Our mysteries hide
In the dark,
If all lit up
By one bright spark

The world would see
The faults and lies
They'd see the pain
They's hear the cries
The bliss of ignorance
Is true
It hides the black
And hides the blue

I'm sticking with
The sense I've got
Nothing too cold
Nothing too hot
Nothing too dark
Nothing too bright
My ignorance
And lack of sight

Birth

Your razorblade mother
Who brought you to life
She bore all her children
When I was in strife

You litter my wrists
Like debris from a storm
And I see you red rubies
You're bitter and warm

And you run down my arm
Like a stream does downhill
Until off of my elbow
You fall then you're still

What a terrible shame
I must wipe you away
Before everyone see's
It's a price I must pay

But I know you'll revisit
And it won't be long
Because then once again
I will hear your sweet song

"Yes we love you fair lady
We'll always be here
We will hold you and calm you
You'll never have fear
For forever we're here
So don't cry now my dear
Wipe away that old tear
For forever we're here
For forever we're here
For forever we're here"

Hand in Hand

A shroud around my head that stops me seeing
That bloodstains on my bed are not okay

It suffocates the sensible and wise in me
From taking all the razorblades away

I cannot see that I have got a problem
I only feel my neverending pain

They tell me but denial is my answer
I make an empty promise once again

Coz when I feel the pain that I've inflicted
My slumber ends and I can be awake

I needn't try to hide and be so perfect
With razor-friends you don't have to be fake

Theres nothing wrong with letting me be natural
If it means I slit my wrists and cry a tear

Don't tell me how to live a perfect life 'cause
Me and denial, hand in hand, we have no fear

--Katie Delaney

It's All Over

I heard them say it
And so did the world
Stairway to where?
I care not
But they are enchanted
Hear their chorus
"But the light is so bright!"
Like moth to flame they flock
A beam of hope
Through their pitiful darkness
Trust in the invisible
Faith in the fake
Relax near the fire
You ask to get burnt
And burn they shall
For eternity and infinity
They hoped
They failed
They lost
And it's all over

Another Poem...

There's a place you can go
Where the blood doth flow
And the heat burns the hair off your skin

Where the sky is red
So the preacher said
And the good guys never win

There's a place I'm told
Where you soul is made cold
As it's thrown in a bucket of ice

But your body's on fire
Like a funeral pyre
This is how you pay the price

It's a price you will pay
Every single day and
Night of eternity

For the wicked don't rest
'till they pass his test
Then at last they can be free

What have they done wrong
To be trapped so long
With the king of the six-six-six?

It's a culmination
Of infuriation
With a dash of lies and tricks

Almost certainly
This is where you'll be
In a hundred years or so

There's no point having fear
As the end draws near
And the flame of your life don't glow

-- © Katie Delaney

Oh my dear!

Oh my dear, what have we here?
A cesspit of anger and strife
Oh dear me, see what I see?
A wasted excuse of a life

Look at this, what lack of bliss!
With tears and hurt and pain
Oh my dear, but you don't care
They shall not live again

Hear me?

I see the pain that lies beneath
Your skin beneath your shield
The hurt you tried to cover up
The aching you concealed

To make your friends not see the truth
Not see that you are weak
But I know that acknowledgement's
The only thing you seek

I don't want you to feel this way
Despite the things I've said
They were in anger and in craze
My mind was tainted red

I'm trying to erase our past
And make it up to you
And I want you to know that I'll
Be honest and be true

Forgive me please for what I've done
It's not happening again
So please don't cry coz I am here
Sun will shine through the rain

--Katie Delaney

Wasted

Can you hear them call your name
As it whispers through the trees
Do you hear their desperate cries
Will you give in to their pleas

Could you see their shape and form
Very distant, very low
Scarlet, burgundy and crimson
As they drift and sweep and flow

Can you smell the scent they radiate
That drifts upon the breeze
Smell of rust and dirt and hating
That the cold will never freeze

Times unmeasurable to them
It does not stop nor does it pass
All they know is what has happened
As they lie there in the grass

After months on years of hoping
Someone finds them and replies
Soon their voices fade to whispers
No-one there to hear their cries

Now they are beings lost forever
Swathed in doubt, they're wandering souls
Suicidal and irrational
Never reaching for their goals

It's the emptiness that gets them
And their world stops in a flash
Now they're just another number
They are not the first to crash

But their lives again are wasted
As have many been before
Suicidal and irrational
And rotten to their core

So they wander round in circles
On the suicidal plain
Never getting one more chance
Life shall never start again

-- © Katie Delaney

Untitled

Unease flowed through her drowsy body. It was not unfamiliar to her, but certainly not welcomed. Too sleepy to fight it, she let the dream overcome her and, not for the first time, she wondered if she would ever wake up.
The stream of fear trickled toward her soul. Crimson as her blood and thick as tar, its movement was judged only by the increasing disomfort she felt spread throughout her body.
The discomfort heightened. As skin, bone and muscle absorbed the poison she was immobilised, helpless, defenceless. He was coming.
His footsteps echoed in her head, the steady beat of a war drum. His smell assailed her nostrils and burned at her sinuses while his presence bounced off the enveloping darkness, resonating in her head. It was a sound only she could hear.
"My love," he purred, his voice suave as sin.
She was utterly frozen. No sound escaped her pale lips, and this seemed to anger him.
"Well? Speak!"
But still she could not. His eyes burned golden under his hood, the sole illumination in the eternal darkness. But no warmth came from those eyes, no empathy. They burned with hate.
"Very well, if you insist," he smiled.
A slender white hand escaped from the folds of his cloak and he raised it to his mouth. He laid a kiss on his index finger and then brought it to her forehead.
"For you my love."
He was barely legible, but she knew the words he had said nonetheless. For he had said them so many times before, words that she would never forget.
One touch was all it took.
The poison caught fire, ripping through her veins. She clenched shut her eyes, but all she saw was that pair of ocher eyes, flaming, burning through her soul. Multiple spasams rocked he body, and a solemn, silent scream finally shook her awake and silenced her pain.

-- © Katie Delaney

Cellar Door

What lies behind the cellar door
Is theft and pain and knowing
As every second passes
The intensity is growing

What lies behind the cellar door
Is secret and is truth
Unwanted, irresistable,
The poison of our youth

What lies behind the cellar door
Is sacred to the sun
Tis cherished forth but with remorse
The day is not yet done

What lies behind the cellar door
Is not seen through the eyes
Will not be touched,nor heard, nor smelt
Or hear your futile cries

What lies behind the cellar door
Is putrid and is vile
It is the burning warning of
The quickly rising bile

What lies behind the cellar door
Still has place in our heart
So come on through and take your place
The show's about to start

-- © Katie Delaney

New Moon

Another tear that stings the wound
You made that never healed
The time decays unmeasurable
And I keep it concealed

You ripped a hole deep in my chest
Somehow I stayed alive
But if this happens once again
I know I won't survive

The words you said, the venom forth
The trust and heart you broke
The whole world died, my soul inside
With every word you spoke

I couldn't think, I couldn't stand
I couldn't even breathe
When you stood right in front of me
And said that you would leave

And that I couldn't come with you
You would leave me behind
You said it all so lightly though
As if I wouldn't mind

The world collapsed and so did I
You're gone without a trace
But oh, the things that I would do
To look upon your face

To die, go to the pearly whites
Is not a sight I'll see
'Cos heaven isn't heaven
Without you right next to me

So here I sit and write and wait
Just wait for you and mourn
Another lonely midnight
And a solitary dawn

-- © Katie Delaney

Inspired by the book

'New Moon' by

Stefanie Meyer